I am lost

I am lost

Who is my savior?

I am a sheep

Who is my shepherd?

The road I take lead to no where

There is a dead end,

No roads that bend.

I am a bird

Where is my nest?

I am a passer-by

Where is my sheld?

The air that I breath

Has no oxygen

There is no hope

It seems immpossible.

I am lost

I am lonely

I want to live

With my love, my hubby !

I am lost

I cannot  see him

I am lost

Why is he is simmering?

He is my life

My purpose

My destiny

He isn’t with me

This is what is killing..!!

Life is so unpredictable

There was a time when I could have told that someone whatever used to come in my heart and cross my mind instantly without any hesitation. Now the time is changed, the situation is changed, now I need to ask God, whether he would reply to my emails, or rather when would he reply to my emails.

It’s a strange part in my life, that the one, my King of the universe is with me, but aren’t with me. There is something which is eating my mind, what is that? Why is this troubling me so much? Why is this thought hovering and creating a cloud of thoughts in my mind?

Why am I so anxious? Why am I feeling that someone is pulling my King away from our universe? Why are things not the same as before? Why and how did the table turn around?

No answers, absoutely no answers, no signal with no connection to the world I am getting.

Why are these thoughts troubling me so much? Why are things aren’t falling the way it should have been now? Why am I feeling myself to be winner but a looser ?

I am just praying to God to relieve me from this pain and give me salvation in his name !!

I QUIT - RESIGNATION LETTER TO THE WORLD

Hi World,

Hope all things in you are the same. But very soon you will lose on someone, it’s me.

I don’t wish to be in you any more, I do not wish to be called a part of you; for all the time that I lived in you, you gave me very little happiness and a lot of sadness. If you gave me food to eat, then at the same time you did not give me shelter. And when you gave me shelter you took away my food from my mouth.

I am not here to critize you for anything, for all that is made in you is just random, I feel that you do not plan yourself properly whom to give what in their life and at what time.

I am so very disappointment with you, that I do not wish to live in you ever. Please answer me world, why did you not give me love in my life when I needed? And when you gave me why did you not introduced at the right time? And if you feel that all your planning was perfect, then let me tell you, you are WRONG; And if your plans were like these, then why such twists and turns in life.

I know you do not have any answer neither do I have any more questions to ask, because for all the questions that I ask you, I know your clear answer; which will again be a SILENT.

All I want to say is I QUIT this place in you the world………………..

Yours truly

Gracy (Priya)

A word out of mouth

It sprouted It came

Under the purple heaven

Reddish and brown

Is the crown

Small wonders;

Small game;

But it holds a lot of

Truth and tragedy,

Love and forgiveness

It is all about

Just a word out of mouth!!

Unknown Faces of Life !!

When life turns around

It gives a shock

Something you expect

Sometimes you become scout

This little I know

About the face of life

Whatever is to happen;

It just sprouts

This little I know

About the face of life

When you expect the least

It becomes loud

This little I know

About the face of life

You can never hate someone

Whom you loved

This little I know

About the face of life

It gives little

And takes back a lot

Only this little I know

About the face of life

Rest all actions are strange

Rest all are UNKNOWN FACES of life !!

The Dark Night

The dark night does not pass
The dark night it last;
Why this Sun is so pale;
Why can't it give me a bale ?
Why can't I be happy again
Why it is all PAIN?

Why the light of my life is away
Why does it not understand,
If it isn't there,
I will fail !

Caught and entangled in life's circle
Someone is here
And other purple !

This dark night why it does not end;
My heart is broken and betrayed
My conscious is killing me every passing hour
O Lord please give me the power !!!

A fly in the ointment

Do not know if I was right,

Do not know if I  fright

Do not know who do I call,

Do not know if this will solve !

The rains I saw

The winters came

All I had

Is just the Pain !

Small things it looked

From the cronies eyes

Why this sea change;

 in my life.

A fool’s paradise

Which I was in

Maybe a bird of hope

Or,

A fly in the Ointment..!!

Feelings……

Have you ever imagined yourself flying? Yes you read it right, yourself flying?

I have experienced it, I am flying in the air of happiness and fulfillment after I got the ‘news’ yesterday; the news that my ears were long awaiting to hear, the news that took my breath away, the news that gave me a sign of relief.

Never ever in life had I urged for something so desperately but for this news.

My love, gave me this news over the phone and made me feel efflorescence; my heart is glowing like a sunflower, which is bending towards the sun because it is giving it rays upon.

My heart is playing like a flute, melody is flowing out like a smooth flowing music.

No, I am not exaggerating, this is what I am feeling now. This is what I always wa nted to happen, but in dark grey sky of life it had hidden, this news was hidden and which took such a long duration to clear the grey sky and show the meadows of heaven and shine the light upon us.

Now, the next plan of action is in place; just hoping and praying that even this give the same great news as  this, but O Lord this time I am expecting the news swiftly.

I want my heart of the heart to be happy, always and forever …..!!!

Phir se……..

Phir dil ne kiya yaad unhe

Phir aakhe bhar aayi

Phir hue hum besabar

Phir maan yu ghabraye

Phir milne ka junoon, phir vo tanhayi

Phir dil doob gaya gaam me

Phir aarmaan jag aaye !

Missing You

I am at a place

From where I cannot gaze

The sweet face so far

A part of my heart

The strong voice I miss

I am used too listening;

as it is to me like a kiss

My heart cruched when I urge

To see and hear his spur

But all I can do is wait

Until the seventh hour

Please come soon my life

Make my heart feel again like a flower.

Life seems Mechanical

I came online to chat with my fiancé, my love; but guess unfortunately he might have gone to sleep (presently his ship is anchorage in China for repairs), and so did not turn up online for chatting. Meanwhile one of my other friend came and we were chatting; in the mid of the conversation I realized and I told him “you are right at one given point in time life seems so mechanical.” Don’t you think it is a common topic in everyone’s lives now-a-days?

We are so busy in our daily routine that we forget most of the times that there are so many milestones in life to cross; and just in the mid of the milestones we become so busy that we forget that if things aren’t sorted out we might miss a chance for the next milestone.

Here I am talking about milestones like to list few, our birth, adolescence, teenage, early 20’s, mid 20’s, marriage, parenthood, grandparenthood and then finally old age.

Now I am just 26 would be completing 27, unmarried. At time stage of life I am so busy and frustrated, that, at times that I don’t realize this frustration which I hold at times, might take away somebody else’s smile for that while. No time for self, no time for friends, no time for family. Aren’t we have become selfish and we have become so self-centered that we have forgotten that we need to be somebody’s spouse, parents, children, in-laws etc and we have to cross those milestone some day.

Coming to the point, in this mechanical life of the daily routine; waking up early, dressing up, going to the office, meeting SLA’s, quality, quantity, projects, assignment, weekend’s college, studies, cooking, washing cleaning etc, this whole routine is becoming so bizarre that I now ask for time to breath; I want to get away from this vicious circle and do for what I am born. What to fulfill the reason for what I have taken time birth.

Last year around the same time I had met a panditji who had told me about my previous life. He was mentioning that due to my previous life’s boug I took birth in this family and in this place; and my purpose of this birth is to serve elderly people around me. But I always have a question in my conscious that Am I giving time to fulfill my purpose? And there is a straight and precise answer ‘NO’. This answer disturbs me every time I become self-centered and forget my duties.